Freedom Looks Good On Michelle

Reach by Michelle Miller

It's awesome the way a new artistic medium ignites my creative process. Encaustic wax is a beautiful thing as are the human skeletal system and actively practicing my unique skills and talents.

Although Encaustic Wax has been used as a painting medium since 200A.D., it has only come into my view in the past 2 months. I spent a few days wondering which came first, the space in my life or this inspirational new medium. Did this new medium drive these beautiful drawings or did the freedom I've come into insist on a creative expression?

Anna and I talked and she suggested it didn't necessarily matter. That they were one and the same. She's probably right.

I realize today that Freedom for me is simply being in the process, getting my hands dirty, and making a visual statement. Working. Playing. Creating. Easy!

Pelvis by Michelle Miller

Guest post by Michelle Miller, March 31, 2014

Brand New Nuanced Freedom Assessment Tool!

No Handbook, No Problem

Background
You all know I've been sitting in satsang with Mooji (up until Friday when I completed the final sit). What I haven't shared yet is that Emma and I have been watching the show "Flashpoint" at the same time.  We love this show; it's Canadian!  

Okay, but that's not why we love the show.  

If you are not familiar with Flashpoint, the show features Team One of the Police Strategic Response Unit. Team One is called in to resolve hostage, bomb and other explosive situations that most officers are not trained to handle.  They always acts as a team and prioritize a peaceful resolution.  

Training
To maintain presence and clarity while in high-stress situations, Team One participates in ongoing, intensive training.  Today we watched episode 15 of Season 4, when a new member of Team One - Raf - is placed into a situational role play with the Tactical Team Leader - Ed.  Ed plays a gunman holding another member of the team hostage.  In this scenario, Raf's role is to talk the gunman down and resolve the situation with no casualties.  

Over and over Raf fails.  And it starts to drive him crazy - what is the answer?  How does he guarantee that nobody will be hurt?  How can he anticipate all possible outcomes and ensure everybody's safety?  How? 

His commanding officer, Sergeant Greg Parker, is not impressed with Raf's carrying on and tells him: 

The moment you think you have all the angles covered, 

you have failed, my friend.

---

At the end of the show, Raf approaches Sgt Parker: 

Raf: I think I know the solution.

Sgt. Parker: Go on.

Raf: There is no solution. The failure, it's built in, you know. And it ain't even about beating the drill.  It's not that.  It's about learning to live with the choices you've made. 

Sgt. Parker: My man.

---

The moment I think I have all the angles covered, I fail.  Not fail like I am a failure of a human being.  But, fail like I have lost sight of the Mystery, I have lost sight of the Unknown, I have lost sight of the Awareness, the Freedom and the Love that I am which is beyond thinking, which doesn't need to anticipate, which doesn't confuse rational linear thinking with "truth", which doesn't second guess, which simply IS.  There is no handbook for Being Free.  We simply are.  

---

Living in the Country
Before going grocery shopping today, I assessed the clothes I was wearing. My outfit was perfect for sorting the recycling, writing some emails and laundry.  I loved how my tank top was the exact same color as the word "baptiste" on the shirt Karen Yencha gave me, and I love that years ago Alice gave me the pants I was wearing.  I could have worn this outfit into town, no problem.  But, then I said to Emma, "If I go out like this, people might think I've given up.  I don't want to depress the good people of North Conway." 

We laugh.

This is me "dressed up" for town. 

This has nothing to do with Flashpoint.  So what?!?!!

It cracks me up, like this Selfie song.  

Alice Speaks: A Girl, Some Yoga, and Redemption

I am honored to be a guest blogger, writer, and person on the Wonder With Institute page.  Anna and I have shared and shaped each other’s worlds for 7 years plus and just as much as I have been her yoga teacher she has been my “human” teacher – she tells it like it is and continues to peel away the layers of her experience that stand in the way of her awesomeness!

I pondered and thought hard about what to share and was going to write something pithy and current when I stumbled upon a story in the cobwebs of my Microsoft documents.  You will now read the edited version – it’s a story about a girl, some yoga, loss, gain and well, redemption!

And so it begins…

Everyone has her story.  

The story usually starts with something like,  “Once, when I was a drug addict”, or “Once, when I was overweight”, or “Once, when I was tossed out and left for dead”…you get the picture.  These stories are important to share.  However, there is another story to be told, a story that is very common and somewhat invisible.

 Drum roll please…

It’s the story of the Perfect Life.  The story where it looks like it is all working out.  The happy or at least not awful childhood, the loving parents, the groovy marriage, the financial success story, the “it all looks good on paper” life.  Yet, if you read between the lines, the heroine is dying a slow death of losing her joy and her life spirit.  At the end of the story, the heroine is left to her own devices, trying to figure out where she “went” wrong even though she believed she was doing everything right.

You know this person.  The householder, the person who lives a good life but is not quite satisfied.  The person who knows that gratitude is the way to go and yet cannot muster up the energy to be thankful.  With this as the backdrop, a low-grade dissatisfaction becomes the normal experience and daily unhappiness goes unnoticed. The person becomes numb to themselves, to the people around them and end up going to their grave with the proverbial question, “what was it all for and why”?  Final gasp, curtain down.

Well, as you may have guessed, I was that person. The rub is that I didn’t know I was leading an unconscious life.  I truly believed if I played by the rules, I would get the life I wanted or that I was supposed to have.  If I was good, I’d be liked, if I did drugs, I’d be cool, if I got married, I’d be complete, if I had a child, I would feel needed, if I stopped doing drugs, I’d be spiritual.  If I said and did the right thing, God (read: Higher Power) would give me what I needed to get the things I wanted to lead a comfortable life that would lead to more unconscious living.

It wasn’t until I started to take my yoga discipline seriously, and by that I mean practicing for over 10 years and then one day deciding to practice everyday for a year, that I slowly began to snap out of it.  AND, I will add that it took me 53 years to get to that place; the place where I began to understand the discipline of discipline.  Before I hit that 10 year mark, I even used my yoga discipline as an “Alice improvement plan”.   I thought if I did it enough (the triple type A approach) I would get better.  I thought it would make me a better person, because I needed to be fixed, and by the way, so do you!  Or, I’ll practice when “I” know it’s right because “I am so in touch with my feelings” approach.  If I could do it my way as opposed to committing to an actual discipline and even open a yoga studio, it would all work out A OK.  

Boy was I WRONG!  But, in the best way possible.

Through the discipline of my yoga practice I am beginning to understand the famous quote by the famous yogi Pattabhi Jois, “practice and all will come.”  And, by the way, there is no one way that all will come.  Yoga is a personal journey of mystery, transformation, breakdown, breakthrough, blood, sweat and tears.  The yoga journey is the path that leads us back to our humanity.

Over the last 2 years, I have had a yoga studio, almost lost a yoga studio, and then built a new studio.  I have been elated, terrified, exhausted, ashamed, depressed and then some.  I tried to fix it, justify it, name it, judge it, evaluate it, give a name and avoid it. I did everything and have done everything EXCEPT give up my discipline of yoga.  And by that I mean the down and dirty practice, no music, no lights, no fancy pants stuff, and no mixing it up.  Just the same old shit, day in and day out, and I can tell you this:

I love my life!  I have a strong body and a spirit that is peeking out behind the curtain, open to the possibility of light, love and faith.  I feel strong and connected while simultaneously feeling it could all slip away at any moment.  It’s my yoga discipline - the relentless ongoing quality of the boring day-to-day grind - that has revealed to me the joy in the everyday quality of life and the access to seeing the spirit of this joy in the people I meet.  I don’t care if I lose everything tomorrow because my yoga discipline has given me everything that I will ever need.

My yoga has given me my LIFE and for that, I will be forever grateful. 

- Alice Riccardi
portlandpoweryoga.com

Locks and Freedom, by Emma

Freedom is not only letting go but accepting that you have some picking up to do, even if it isn’t your mess. Which is hard for me because I am a “fair and not fair” person. (Obviously, I’m fifteen.) So even though there’s a mess in me that someone else should be picking up, living with a messy castle in my head is no way to get revenge on the person who made it that way.

Show them you are free. Clean up. 

Now my mom likes to leave her heart open to everyone, and I think that takes a lot of clarity and self-awareness. That isn’t how I think or want to think.  As I said, I’m fifteen. 

Once I am done cleaning, you can be damn sure I am changing the locks and putting an electric fence and a gate up. 

This is my way of proving to myself that you can be free even with a guard up. 

Because being free doesn't mean loving all and everything. Have a little self freedom. Remember that it is okay to clean up and lock up. You aren’t being closed hearted, you are protecting yourself, and who ever said that isn’t freedom?

- Emma Allocco

love and liberation

Pema Chodron teaches us to regard everything in life as a key to freedom, a passage to our inner nature.  

Eckhart Tolle makes everything immediate.  I am.  Now.  Bam!

Direct experience for 5 weeks with Mooji is available for anyone with a desire for freedom.  He embodies truth; liberation is our natural state.  

Stars and Mountains and Music. Very Good.

Thank you for giving attention to freedom. Personally, I think we're revolutionaries, the vanguard even!  I'm not saying that other people aren't, by the way.  I simply have experience - in one way or another - with you all and I declare each of you and our collective attention to be positively impacting everyone on the planet such that each of us feels more enlivened, connected and relaxed.  Anything else you'd like to add?  Put it in.  

It seems like there's no answer, no solution, no problem, no prescription. Only discovery.  I mean, really.  No answer.  It's blowing my mind.  But, I vowed (to myself) to keep this post low on Anna drama.

---

What a beautiful exploration.  There's something in each of us - curiosity, sweetness, fire, devotion - that said yes to experiencing Free Like That.  All those somethings together are like:  

Here's a link if the video clip doesn't make it to the blog page. 

---

As for my ego and I... Mooji said in the satsang that I watched this morning:
   If there is a sniper season 
   and you take things out, that is okay.  
   But this is not full time work. 
Yesterday, I was feeling thusly. The tone has shifted, however.  Now we're here.  

Arson at the Trading Post

Tonight Michelle asked if I wanted to talk by texting, "You can tell me more about Mooji. ;)"  

Michelle is like Jimmy Fallon; she is the expert of friendly spot-on teasing!  She just nailed it with that text.  I am all "Mooji said..." this and "Mooji said..." that.  

It's not surprising; I have been sitting in satsang with Mooji for almost 40 days. The entire satsang is available for free on-line.    Anyone can have the same experience without paying a dime or giving their email to anyone.  You don't need to register or apply.  No advance training or skills are required.  It's open satsang like each day opens for all of us. 

 

---

In Saturday's satsang, a man got up and asked Mooji about love. Mooji said "It's too late for the love bus, this is the freedom bus." The man wasn't satisfied with what Mooji said so he asked, "What's the point if we're not loving people?"  

You cannot love. 

You can only love when you are free. 

When you are not free, 

you trade,

you want something. 

Love becomes business

when you love from ego only.

Ego Trading Post

You know the Ego Trading Post.  We all know the Ego Trading Post.  It's how our personality operates in the world.  After we regard the delusion that we are physical and psychological individuals as a fact, our entire experience is confined to and dictated by the Ego Trading Post. 

Everything is a trade at the Ego Trading Post. I support you, you support me. And if you don't support me the way everyone in their right mind knows you should support me according to the going rate, you will become a customer in bad standing.  At least until you pay your debt. 

And there's a lot of strategy. I make sure not to ask for too much.  That means that when I do make a big request I can point to my record and say, "I've been a great customer at the Ego Trading Post, always paid on time. Now, you can roll out a little credit for me, can't you?"  

All these subtle negotiations and expectations.  It's a racket!  An exhausting racket with layers of obligation and  polite manipulation.  

I'm burning the Ego Trading Post down!  

I'm putting it out of business; all debts are cleared.  

Nobody owes me anything and I don't owe anybody else anything. 

All accounts are settled. 

Think how freaking intense this is to give up acting from any sense of expectation or obligation.  Can you even imagine that?  Think about what you expect from yourself.  From your partner. Your family.  Life.  Really, consider giving all that up.  You don't actually have to to give up anything; you have nothing to prove.  The question is only a means of exploring what you own and what owns you.  

You're much grander than any and all expectations, no matter how refined or positive.  Don't shrink yourself down into some tiny trading post.   Even if you have made it familiar and cozy; it's still a cage.  

Let's burn that place down!

I am razing the Ego Trading Post to the ground.  

I might as well because I cannot do business there.  I am not one bit interested in anyone talking to me about the bad deal they got.  Do you know who you are?  If you did you would not give a crap about whatever it is you're saying is some kind of problem.  

I am bored by insistence on and fear of competition.  Burn the Ego Trading Post down and that's taken care of!

I'm out, people.  I'm not interested in this kit and caboodle. Running around looking for this or that, thinking we have problems because we forget who we are and then justifying the problems as real seems like an absurd way to express life.

Maybe this is why Mooji says "be quiet."  Because if I go around talking like this post, things might not go so well.  I'd be charged with arson.  

*By the way, the David Hasselhoff picture is awesome, right?  

His turtleneck matches the red font and fire graphic and 

I thought he added some encouragement 

to a somewhat confronting post.  

Dispelling Pretense in Three Acts

Act One

This morning I watched this video clip from the The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. I thought, "I have to share this with the Free Like That-ers."  Why?  Because I adore Jimmy Fallon and he provides entertaining, positive challenges to the established social pattern.  We're all friends and we're all free on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon!  

  

Act Two

Louis C.K. takes more of a punk-rock see-the-dirt approach to breaking out of society's pattern of what we talk about and how.   If you are new to him, he is edgy.  He dives into the bile of the ego and somehow transforms the most acute cases of Ego Inflammation Disorder to entertainment.  You have got to watch this Why I Hate Cell Phones video!  Even if you hate it, you can appreciate it.  I showed Michelle a couple of Louis C.K.'s video and she liked some of them.  Some of them. 

Act Three

Emma:  What is that thing you're doing now?

~ I give her a look of confusion ~

Emma: You know, that writing every night thing?

Me:  Free Like That?

Emma: Yeah.  I found a video for you to show everyone tonight. 

** This video includes some inappropriate and lewd behavior **

(Too risky?)

---

Whether you are now appalled, confused or entertained, these comedians all challenge the pretense of ego.  And you know what I'm saying...

Burn Baby Burn!

A Great Seeming

When I was at Level One Teacher Training with Baron Baptiste this summer, he coached people to use the word seem: 

"I have a hard time with forgiveness." 

"It seems like you have a hard time with forgiveness."

"It seems like I have a hard time with forgiveness." 

I don't remember if this exact exchange took place.  What I remember is how the energy shifted each time a participant accepted Baron's invitation to use the word seem.  Basically, people got lighter, like they let go of something.  Whenever I use the word seem, I soften any attachments I have to the story I'm telling.  When I soften my attachment to the story, I soften the tendency to identify with the personal self who is invested in the story. This, of course, frees me up to be my true self, again.  

So, it seems like I've had a raging case of Ego Inflammation Disorder today.  The symptom that seems to be plaguing me is self-doubt.  It seems like my personal self is raising a ruckus by yammering on and on about how I am attached to thinking and that means I am not in touch with my true nature.  I watch the "I" and - BAM! - there's the self-doubt again.  Which seems to prove I'm a hopeless head-case.  

Eventually, I got mad.  This sucks!  The vast majority of us are hypnotized into believing we are preferences, memories, mental projections, goals and bodies.  Believing this is all we are, people are inherently anxious and agitated.  It's no wonder war, child slavery, pollution and scape-goating plague the planet!  

 You know what I say to that ego identity and all the crap associated with it?!?

Burn Baby Burn!

My personal self/ego doubts who I am, and it can go on doubting for as long as it doubts.  That is the task of the personal self and it is none of my business.  I am not that. 

Ahhhh.... much better! 

The Great Seeming
This world is a sometimes world. 
Sometimes this...
Knowing this, 
we should not be too worried. 
Everything is a great seeming.
- Mooji

Sometimes mind is agitated, sometimes it is calm. Sometimes there is snow, sometimes rain.  Sometimes people agree, sometimes people disagree. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. Sometimes it's this, sometimes it's that.  Everything we can ever experience -  

• Insecurities, triumphs, emotions, thoughts
• Planting life in barren places
• Inviting appreciation
• Celebrating departure

is coming and going.  Sometimes we enjoy the great seeming, other times we don't.  In any case, there is an awareness to whom this sometimes world reports.  You.  Me.  We're pretty frickin' incredible.  

Trust is a Five Letter Word

Do you remember all the hoop-la when it was revealed that James Frey's book A Million Pieces wasn't the memoir the author first claimed it was?  So many people, including Oprah, expressed feelings of anger and betrayal. However, the truth of the story didn't change.  The book sold millions of copies because people felt the story was believable. 

Do you trust the story without trusting the story teller?

----

Do you trust:

• antibiotics
• your spouse
• water
• love
• death
• the river behind your house
• grace
• what happened on Wheel of Fortune?

----

How about:

1. Crop Circles

2. Sailing Stones

3. Near Death Experiences

----

When you know who you are, 
you are grounded in your power and
trust is not required.

When you are identified with your ego,
you give your power away and 
mistrust other people and phenomena.  

Forget about assessing who and what is 'true.' 
Confirm you are free and watch the truth reveal itself.  
So much easier.  

Wicked Free

First and foremost, if you have not seen Wicked (this quote is from the song Defy Gravity) and you have the opportunity to.... say yes!

Second of all, this morning when I considered the proposal I sent to BPYI I had a few moments thinking things like: 

• Who do I think I am?  
• Shit. Am I trying to be someone?  
• I'll never be able to sustain the clarity and presence I communicated.

I'm hearing these thoughts, being the awareness of the thoughts and then, "Oh, snap!  Is this a freedom hangover?" Like Brene Brown's vulnerability hangover?   

But, Brene Brown told everyone about having a mental breakdown.  I told everyone about being proof of yoga.  Why would I experience any amount of ego-inspired insecurity?

Oh, you wily mind sneaking through with that kind of thinking.  Being free doesn't look or taste a particular way! 

There is no standard for Free.  
There is no path for Free.  
Free is.

These are not concepts.  If you skimmed through those last three  lines you are missing the point.  Ingest it with me:
There is no standard for Free
There is no path for Free
Free is.

Whenever you doubt or get confused about being free, consider that only your personal self can doubt and be confused.  Universal Self is crystal clear, there is no confusion.  This Universal Self is always present.  Simply pay attention to the part of you that is effortless, pay attention to being awareness.  

This is simple but the ego-mind doesn't like it when we give our attention to being awareness and will put up a fight.  The way my mind fights includes disguising the following rules as truth: 

• we are obligated to spend time with certain people
• the physical world is more real than the non-physical world
• responsible adults have retirement accounts
• 'good' relationships look a certain way
• if I make the right moves, I will be rewarded
• other people's approval will bring me happiness

The ego needs those rules.  I don't.  Neither do you. 

We're Wicked Free Like That.  

Watch the I

Sitting in satsang with Mooji for weeks and weeks is having a profound impact on me.  Mooji does not teach, he has no knowledge to impart or products to sell.  In satsang, people ask questions and Mooji points to who people are (true nature) and who people are not (personal self).  He does not prepare, he simply sits and guides people through Self-Inquiry.  

I am not Mooji, we are not in Rishikesh and I don't think any of you are sitting in satsang via the internet.  (If you are, tell me!)  So, I think it will be helpful to clarify a couple terms: 

1. personal self - body, psychological mind - memories, attachments, projections, expectations, mental chatter, habits - and other characteristics of the ego's self-image.  A personal somebody.  
2. original self/true nature - awareness, presence, timeless, effortless, unbound, source.  A universal nobody.  

Who we are, our true nature, is free.  This is not a concept or something to believe in.  It's a discovery each of us makes as many times as necessary before we completely surrender to this awareness.  Per every sage in every time and place, the discovery of our true nature is the most important discovery any of us can offer humanity.  

Self-Inquiry is Only This

Notice who you are.  

Watch the I. 

If you don't get it, if it feels difficult, 

don't watch what's difficult, 

watch the I.

- Mooji

Your thinking mind, your personal self, will resist this discovery.  Let me demonstrate:

My Ego's Top Five Reasons to Reject Self-Inquiry

1. Get real; liberation for all sentient beings is more likely if someone discovers a cure for cancer and/or an infinite supply of clean drinking water.
2. If it's this simple, why haven't we all been liberated already?
3. If I'm liberated, I will not have anything in common with people I care about.
4. I don't think I'm doing this right. Shouldn't I see the light?
5. People I love will say that I am irresponsible and selfish for leaving my personal problems.

Don't take it personally when your mind does everything it can to distract you from discovering your true nature.  We have all been conditioned to identify with an insecure personal self and we all have mental habits born from that conditioning.  You are not those habits, no matter how persistent they appear.  

There is no problem with the mind.  Problems arise when we become attached to the chatter of the mind, so attached that we identify with it.  Let's say you got an email from someone telling you about a mistake you made at work.  You start wondering if you will get fired.  You feel insecure and angry.  If you get caught up in that thinking and feeling you are identifying with a personal self.  From here, all problems arise.  All problems are a function of identifying with a personal self.  And liberation for all sentient beings unfolds when you discover your true nature. 

No belief is necessary.  Look for yourself.  Don't think about who you are.  Look. 

Notice who you are.  

Watch the I. 

If you don't get it, if it feels difficult, 

don't watch what's difficult, 

watch the I.

As soon as we turn our attention to the awareness of the personal self, we create spaciousness.  We cannot be aware of the personal self and be the personal self at the same time.  Self-Inquiry is immediate detachment from the personal self and direct experience of our true nature, Free.

You know how there are people who you just love being around?  They don't have to say a thing, they exude good energy. Don't you then just love introducing that person to other people in your life?   Multiply that experience by 1,000 and that is what Mooji is like. And, he is you.  He is me. He is an awakened Universal Being.  So, I invite you spend some time with him.  You can follow this link to a 50-minute guided meditation with Mooji. (There are logistical updates for the first 10 minutes.)  I am aware that your mind will come up with a million reasons why 50-minutes is too long.  

Notice who you are.  

Watch the I. 

If you don't get it, if it feels difficult, 

don't watch what's difficult, 

watch the I.

Here is a 30-minute guided meditation with Mooji if that makes being with him any easier for you.    

Feel it Out

Yesterday, Emma and I were in the car heading to my brother's house.  We had two missions: see our 8-day-old cousin/nephew Eliot and visit with my Dad.   Some of you might remember, from Love Like That, that my dad had hip surgery recently.  After weeks of physical therapy and rest, he was cleared to drive. His first big trip? Maine to meet Eliot.  

Sunday morning my brother Luke and sister-in-law Hill took Eliot to their niece's baptism; my dad stayed home watching their other two boys - Benjamin and Oliver.  (Ben, director of Animals in Space 2 .)

Me:  Emma, when we get to Luke's  can you help with the boys so that Pop-Pop can relax?  Or, I'll help with the boys and you can chill with Pop-Pop? I want to make sure he's recovering. 

Emma:  Mom, why don't we get there first and then feel it out. 

Me:  Emma.... you're right.  Sounds good.  

We talk some more about my Dad and family and at some point Emma says that her hips have been sore. 

Me:  Let's practice some yin yoga this afternoon. It will totally help.

Emma:  That one where you're all still and quiet?

Me:  Yes.  You liked it.  Remember?

Emma:  No Mom, I hated it.  I fell asleep.  I hate stillness.  I hate quiet. 

Me:  Why?

Emma: I just do.

Me:  What about being still makes you hate it?

Emma: Mom, stop annoying me! I just hate it.

Me:  I'm not trying to make you do anything, Emma.  You're so clear you hate stillness and I'm curious why.

~ pause while Emma contemplates whether her mom is selling her snake oil ~

Emma:  I just don't like quiet.  I'd rather listen to music, or the rain, or someone telling a good story.  

Me:  I like listening to all those things, too.  Here's the thing... my teachers say that freedom and stillness and quiet are all related.     

Emma:  It's impossible to be quiet.  Nobody can do it.  

Me:  What do you mean?

Emma:  People's minds are always thinking things.  That's not going to stop.  And there's always noises and things happening.  Quiet is impossible. 

Me:  Yeah, I get what you're saying. It's true - our minds are not going to stop thinking and there will probably always be noise in our environment.  But there's a quiet behind the noise. This quiet stillness is the place that we hear noise from.  

Emma:  So?

Me:  Well, when we connect with that quiet stillness we connect with our true nature, we experience who we really are.  And being connected with our true nature - not just all the thinking and noise that goes on in our heads - makes it possible to be free and happy no matter how chaotic and noisy life is.   

Emma: No. 

Me:  No?

Emma:  No.  That's a hippy shaman lie.  

We laugh. 

Me:  Nice, Emma.  You've taken a look and experienced this to be a lie?    

Emma:  It's just so stupid, mom.  Stillness?  How are you going to live your life?

Me:  Feel it out.    

Force, Freedom and Ego Inflammation

Force
In response to my Facebook status that I was thrilled to buy  insurance through the healthcare marketplace, my friend commented that she doesn't like being forced to buy health insurance.  (She also posted she was happy for my daughter and I, by the way.)

I can totally relate; I don't like feeling forced to do anything.  Actually, I DESPISE it!

Who doesn't?  Who among us thinks, "Yes, I am happy to be forced into something."  If you're happy to be into something, then there's no force.  Force is a function of not liking something, in this case.  Right?

There are so many things in the manifest world (the world of form, time and change) that I do not like:  slavery, sex trafficking, war, starvation, cancer, hate crimes and environmental degradation.   Those are some big ticket items. 

Then, there's the garden variety disasters: a loved one's depression, the bank account balance, the remark someone made at the party last night, the ten pounds picked up over the holidays, people telling the same boring stories over and over and over again....

The manifest world is RIFE with pain and suffering, with things we don't like.  

Attention
How do we deal with this?  How can we know of such experiences and still get out of bed in the morning?  The ego is not equipped to explore such a profound inquiry.  But, the ego is arrogant and loud.  It doesn't say, "listen, this isn't really my sort of thing, let the heart and spirit provide leadership."  Nope; ego says, "Follow me.  Use your mind to sort pain and suffering into two categories:  

1. pain that can be avoided if people wise up
2. pain that cannot be avoided"  

With the mind thusly mired by analyzing who did what and why, and the pain itself, there is no attention on who you are.  People have been distracted away from their Self - which is always and inherently Free - to the mental delusion that if some people wise up there wouldn't be this pain and suffering!  So then you find yourself distracted from your inherent peace and freedom when you could use it most!  (Okay, 'use' isn't the best word choice.)

ICD 333:  Ego Inflammation Disorder 

If you think something unpleasant could be avoided if other people would get their freaking acts together, you are bound to focus on their behavior.  (See symptom 3.) This will make your life a living hell.  

When was the last time you put yourself through this misery?  When was the last time that you were suffering and you focused on how other people - spouses, kids, the 'other' political party, rude people in stores, debt collectors - had to change so you (and others) could stop suffering?  A nightmare, right?  You could be the smartest, kindest, best-looking, funniest, most charming person in the world (as judged by a celebrity panel of judges in a reality show called "Cream of the Crop") and still you cannot control other people's behavior.  

Instead, this preoccupation with other people adds disempowerment to your anxiety and/or depression.  Oh, Ego Inflammation Disorder, you are one wily mo'fo'!  

Remember, there is treatment!  See photo above or for more details you can review the Ego Inflammation Disorder educational video.  

Freedom
Seeing is Freeing.  When you notice, "dang, I have Ego Inflammation Disorder" you are immediately free again!  Being free, actions effortlessly unfold.  

When you see your ego, you detach from it's straightjacket.    Awareness comes first, comes before.  Your ego cannot exist without you as awareness. This isn't a theory.  This is direct experience.  Look.  Right now.  If your mind starts wondering, "yeah, but if I die, other people can still be aware of x catastrophe" look for who is aware of this mental chatter.  Who hears this rationalizing?  Who notices this thinking?  Don't think about it, look.  Who are you?

You are free.  You are the awareness of experience.  Nothing can force you. Force only exists when you identify as your ego and body.  That is not who you are. You are the one aware of the mind and body.  Look.  Wow, you are also the awareness of awareness of mind and body.  Look.  This is not a test or trick or idea.  Be who you are. The mind will do it's best to distract you out of awareness, it will rationalize, instigate guilt trips, and make promises. Don't take the bait.  All that thinking comes and goes.  That is not you.  Look for what does not change.  Look for what is timeless and effortless.  Be Free.  

You are here to win yourself back

from delusion, 

from the hypnosis of conditioning

and false and limited identification with the ego. 

- Mooji